Post by No Personality on Apr 13, 2010 11:48:10 GMT -5
This so isn't the right place nor the right movie for me to begin discussing my difficult relationship with classic film. And by classic, I do mean "classic" is in "relic." Nearly every film made before the 1960's is a relic. And that's just in my eyes. I like to think of myself as being wonderfully open-minded. I'm not always (am I?). But the point is, try getting a freshman class of today's kids in high school to watch a black-and-white Bette Davis or Katharine Hepburn picture. Or better yet, one of those ultra-gay old musicals. Even I have trouble with those things. And can you believe that in the 70's and 80's, people used to point to the oldies and say that's "when Men were Men!"? Well, the new millennium has killed a great deal of the respect people used to have for classic Hollywood films. Then look at me- I'm one of the nicer ones!
So, it's 1950 and Men are Men. That's men as in Clark Gable, Cary Grant, and Fred MacMurrary (don't ask yet; it's a Disney thing!). And Sunset Boulevard is all-Man alright. Only it's about a Man's Man who's a bit slinkier than your average leading-man. He's a screenwriter who just can't catch a break. And his pride is sorta for sale, since he's being hassled day and night by Repo Men. His rent is 3 months overdue on his apartment and now, some thugs are after his car. This Man loves his car (don't they all?). He'd do anything to keep it. So when he accidentally meets a washed-up silent movie star with money to burn, he cons her into paying him to revise her pet-passion project: a comeback script (yes I remember the line, but let's stick to the facts) that has her starring as some epic princess called "Salome." I obviously know nothing about history but I can Wiki it.
I also don't know anything about classic Hollywood. At best, I recognize a few names. And "Gloria Swanson" means nothing to me. From watching the movie, I know she's a real classic beauty. And that classic beauty truly is ageless. By this, I'm referring to the footage we see from one of her silent films that director Billy Wilder pulls an insider / film buff and shows it in this film (in a scene where Swanson's Norma Desmond watches "a picture" with her new friend / companion). I don't know if she was a teen or a 20-something at the time that silent was filmed, but she looked no different than some of the girls I remember when I was younger (from the 90's). She was absolutely, stunningly gorgeous. And it's nice to know this since the movie casts her in her 50-something's in a movie where several characters are insulting her or making references to how old she is.
The subject playing her arm-candy in this portrait of the Kept Man's burden is William Holden. And for a man in his early 30's, we can see that cigarettes used to really add some years to your face. She'd look incredible for 60. Him... well, I made a wild guess while I was watching the movie a couple hours ago and came up with 39. I was trying to flatter him (in my estimation), thinking IMDb would show me his casting was trying to show the actor playing the character as nearly as sad as she was. I didn't realize she was actually 50. He looked 41, so in the back of my mind I honestly thought he was more like 43. He was 31. Well... I guess no one looked their real ages back then. Nancy Olson (Disney's Pollyanna) sure as hell didn't look 22! Come to find out she was more like 21 at the time of filming. That's scary. She looked nearly 28.
This movie is (fittingly, considering its' subject matter) obsessed with age. So all we can do is say at least the characters Betty and Joe look better than Norma Desmond. At one point, Joe says "there's nothing wrong with being 50, not unless you try to look 29!" If that's not verbatim, it's close enough. I guess that's the only nice thing he's got to say. He's meant to be playing a real "tough," "hard-edged" character. But really he just comes off as another sad, bitter straight. With a body like he's got, he has no right to bitch. And of course, this is before they all knew how bad cigarettes were for you. So, had he known, everyone in the audience would agree with me and go, sarcastically; "poor baby!" Though, in all his suits (they sure loved to dress formal, all the time, back in the 40's / early 50's), he does look a bit tubby and out of shape.
But is that any reason to feel bad for this guy? No. Not that I'm saying this is an ideal-type situation for anyone to be in. The relationship between Joe and Norma comes off a little bit more like a Mother and Son. All the mothers I knew treated their sons like butlers, even though the sons knew it wasn't a big deal. So, Joe doesn't act like it's a very big deal. But God, does he whine enough for a dozen Kept Men, or what? And again, to bring up the topic of his bitterness- he has a sarcastic comment for everything. Though this is done post-mortem, he narrates nearly every scene in the movie and his screenwriter character likes to be really try to burn everyone. Everyone... older than his generation. So even in death, he's shallow and unsympathetic. I guess being dead would ultimately explain the bitterness. But he makes out good on the deal. Just look at the document he left on how buff his bod was. Looks can kill after all.
